Peanut Gallery: One of my family’s sojourns was in a wealthy suburb of New York City – a community of privileged, financial “movers and shakers” with high expections for everyone – especially their kids. It never ceased to amaze me, however, the preponderance of “nannies” in the community (live-in child caretakers)… making minimal wages – many of whom were not American citizens, and spoke barely adequate english.
These supposedly “brightest of the bright” parents were outsourcing the daily care and upbringing of their kids to people with whom they had little or nothing in common. They demanded the “best” in everything else, but went “on-the-cheap” when it came to daily home care and basic training in manners and civility for their children.
But this is not simply a problem for rich folks with “more bucks than brains”… it’s happening in all socio-economic communities across America.
In most homes, both parents work – either to support a “better” lifestyle or for “self-actualization” – and farm out their kids for others to raise… often having no idea what’s going on after they leave. Hence the growth in the niche spy-cam business.
“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” – Proverbs 22.6 NLT
When we look at what’s happened to our kids in America, we need to look first in the mirror.
The primary job of parents is not financial security, or personal fulfillment, but “directing their children onto the right path.” And that means shaping their hearts, souls and minds… and preparing them to face the world as responsible Christian adults.
Two recent posts from bloggers new to me Ooobie on Everthing and Homeschool Mom prompted this post.
“What’s the matter with kids today?” by Ooobie on Everything made the point:
We lost the last three generations to the left because of our mindless pursuit of material benefit, and at the time it didn’t seem such a big deal. At first there were lots of grandparents to take care of kids if both parents worked. Over time, though, the grandparents and the grandchildren ended up living far apart, which meant no family supervision of our children as we toiled to better ourselves. We didn’t have time to spend with our children, teaching them our values and shaping their young minds. Our responsibilities were shuffled off onto the teachers and the media and the entertainment industry, all of which were our babysitters. While Mom and Dad earned enough for a second car, the highly malleable children imbibed the sexual depravity and violence of the entertainment world and values and ideas of the Marxists who controlled the education system.
That’s pretty strong stuff… but it’s true. Do you remember the delusional rationalizations about spending “quality” time with your kids? Think of your own family patterns and those of your friends over the past 50 years – if you can remember that far back. Who took care of the kids?
But that was then and this is now. Who’s taking care of the kids now?
Which brings me to the second blogger – new to me – A Homeschool Mom. The post that caught my attention was today’s – “Park Day Resumes.” She came up with a great, simple, idea for sharing family history and values –
While the kids were running around, the adults had a fun conversation about history coming alive. Many of us had interesting stories of relatives who not only lived during exciting times in American history, but passed down items of interest!
What a wonderful way for our children to learn history, knowing that their own families were a part of the action and possibly played an important part.
One of our families has quilts that date back to the Civil War and antiques which are even older. Most of us had family that came through Ellis Island and have their names in the book. My husband’s great-grandparents actually ran with Poncho Villa (no, seriously; we have pictures)!
I think history takes on a whole new meaning when we have a personal attachment to it. How exciting history becomes when we see it as more than just words in a book, but actual experiences that someone lived through.
What fascinating part of history has your family been a part of?
Not everyone is cut out for homeschooling. But sharing your family’s values just takes a willingness to carve out some time and think about what makes your family special. It’s not rocket science. Even Grandparents can do it.
My wife had a saying, “In our family, we….” She used it often to distinguish our family’s values from those of our neighbors. It was a “compare and contrast” exercise that helped form our children’s self-understanding. It defined who we were, what was important to us and how everyone in our family was expected to live – honoring God and loving one another.
“Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it.” – Proverbs 22.6 NLT
If you don’t do it, who will?
This blessing – “you’re my child and I’m proud of you” – is something we all yearn for. We want it at the end of life from our heavenly Father. And we want it during our lifetime from our earthly fathers.
In the middle of the “most wonderful time of the year,” many of you are facing a dilemma or difficulty. You may have a strained relationship with one or multiple family members. Perhaps you’re lonely or grieving a loss and the holidays are particularly painful for you. Or, this is the busiest time of the year and you dread the rat race that often accompanies this season.
The Peanut Gallery 