“Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace.”
Ephesians 4:3 NLT
“I am writing these things to you now… [so] you will know how people must conduct themselves in the household of God. This is the church of the living God, which is the pillar and foundation of the truth.”
1 Timothy 3:14-15 NLT
Day 19 0f 40: Community requires commitment – “It takes both God’s power, and our effort to produce a loving Christian community.”
Warren goes on to make the point that many people, growing up in unhealthy (and even dysfunctional) families, have never learned the relational skills needed to build Christian community. But even if our human families were healthy, for the most part, it still takes commitment – and conscious choices – on our part to make it work.
I have to ask myself: “Is it worth it, at this stage in my life, to make the effort to get involved in these people’s lives?”
The answer is not a simple “yes, of course.” It requires that I count the cost – and that cost is outlined in Warren’s 9 characteristics of biblical fellowship: “authenticity, mutuality, sympathy, mercy, honesty, humility, courtesy, confidentiality, and frequency.” Warren suggests that a small group, interested in going deeper into Christian community, work out a covenant that they can agree on – to spell out the expectations of the group. This is where the rubber meets the road.
What am I willing to commit to? And for how long? What are the costs/benefits of this commitment? And how will it effect my other commitments – to my church, my family, my friends, etc? Our current small group is committed to reading through PDL for 40 days, meeting together weekly for 7 weeks for discussion, praying for specific needs, and trying to extend Christian grace and encouragement to one another. To be honest, we hardly know each other. But this chapter presses us to consider going deeper over an extended period of time.
What would a covenant that included these 9 characteristics of Christian community look like? Here’s a start –
- Authenticity: I agree to be open about who I am and what’s going on. (1 John 1.7)
- Mutuality: I agree to both give and receive encouragement. (Romans 1.12)
- Sympathy: I agree to try to understand the perspective of others. (Galatians 6.2)
- Mercy: I agree to extend grace and forgiveness to others. (2 Corinthians 2.7)
- Honesty: I agree to be honest about myself and our life together. (Ephesians 4.15)
- Humility: I agree to think of others before myself. (Philippians 2.3-4)
- Courtesy: I agree to be considerate and patient with others. (Romans 15.1-2)
- Confidentiality: I agree to keep confidences and help create a safe place for sharing. (Proverbs 16.28)
- Frequency: I agree to make our get-togethers a priority. (Hebrews 10.25)
This is not something a PDL reading group can simply morph into. As Warren points out:
It means giving up our self-centeredness and independence in order to become interdependent. But the benefits of sharing life together far outweigh the costs, and it prepares us for heaven.
Preparation for heaven has real appeal me.
The Peanut Gallery 